Eleven
I bought her the present and after much angst gave it to her. I have no idea how she feels about it.
She saw the comic in my file and read it aloud. So cute. Still she doesn't know.
The cure... refused
Her cell phone. Before I lost mine, I would still send her messages, even when I knew she'll never read them. Or maybe I sent messages because I knew she will never read them.
The longing...
I doubt she's even read it.
Why do I like her? I was asked that. I have reasons but I wonder if they're enough.
If I do not at least tell her, it will be another regret.
The high..
"Things are easier when you don't feel anything."
I'm tempted to draw back to the shadows.
Eleven. I am too scared to proceed. I really do not want to leave this part of my life with another regret. But my feelings.. I do not know what they are right now. In some moments I like her, in others my heart is cold. Her presence in my life has made me all confused. I attempt to take refuge in intellect but.. matters of the heart is such an irrational thing. Simplistic songs of love with cheesy lyrics... her existence makes me listen to them in new light. Irrational.
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