Meep. I can't stop myself from putting down all this crap into my blog. Oh well. I suppose it would be a nice way to look back when all this passes.

A couple of songs that I found appropriate to what I'm feeling right now. Lifehouse's Breathing and Voh's Pull it Off. Although Breathing is kinda stalker freaky in the lyrics.

I wish she would stop sending me forwards and reply to something. At the very least, tell me if I'm bothering her. Tell me to go away, stop it, fuck off, whatever. I... I don't know. At least I would know how she feels. At least I would know to start forgetting... (or maybe that should be to start trying more? meh)

I hope she comes to school next week. At least I'll get to see her and uhm, ask her if it annoys her/disturbs her/makes her want to get a restraining order on me. Irunno. Or maybe I'll stop being so damn oblique and ask her outright, or tell her outright. Bleh. I've contemplated calling her up but it just feels wrong to do that. Idunno why either.

Okay, enough of this crap. I still can't sort it out but whatever. Cross it when I come to the bridge.

Anyway, went out in the rain again today. Damn I love it. I give todays rain two thumbs up. It had everything. A great build up, suspense, action. Woo.

I went out to sit by myself before the rain properly began, to think about things and to be alone. I didn't have to wait long before it started. The drizzle started, riding the high wind, getting whipped into icy darts that hit you with force, like kisses from an ice queen.

I step out of the cover of the carport into the rain itself. A mad exhilirating rush. The wind, the rain. They envelope me in their mad, twisting, passionate dance. The rain being carried by the wind. Sigh. It was so so cold but it made me feel alive. I love the elements :)

Later in the evening, as far as I can remember, the first blackout I'd experienced here! That was kind of a surprise. One moment I'm watching Dark Angel, drooling over Jessica Alba (so hawt) the next I'm sitting alone in the darkness, wondering wtf happened. It was kinda fun in the new experience kind of way. The whole subdivision was plunged into darkness. No streetlights, no nothing. We just sat around the living room, hunkered down with the rest of the family carrying flashlights.

During the blackout (which couldn't have lasted for more than an hour, maybe it was around 45 minutes), I sent her part of the lyrics (whoops, back to this) to Lifehouse - Breathing.

'Cause I'm hanging on every word you say

And even if you don't want to speak tonight

It's alright, alright with me

See? Stalker-ish lyrics. At least I didn't send her the next part which was about.. sitting outside her door.. and listening to her breathing.. yeah. Maybe a bad choice of song.