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/me does the biannual blog dust off

The server hosting the blog images has gone offline. I actually like the inadvertent minimalist feel to it now.

Back from internship. Lessons learned there indeed. I now need to get out of school and into the scary as frak 'real' world.

First time in a week or so that I see the sun. I was a space cadet the whole time I was out in the world, looking up at the sky like that. Reason for my confinement? PyWeek! I think this is my first complete game ever and it was completed in a week! Awesome. Could never have done it without gord, the main programmer of our game. The game is very very pretty. Not necessarily innovative gameplay wise but I feel its pretty solid. Got the game making bug now that I've got one complete game under my belt.

Tangentially, I am fucking pissed at the local roman catholic churches. Maybe not everyone is spewing the same rhetoric but jeez. They are fighting the passing of a bill about sex education. This. Is. Stupid. And the crap they are spewing? That the supporters of the bill are false prophets. Can't make this shit up folks. We're back in the middle ages where the church wishes to suppress knowledge for their own ends. It's incredibly... god.. angering that they will refuse to ease the burden of their flock HERE ON EARTH. It's the same kind of reasoning that brought about the god damn inquisition. We'll make you suffer so your soul will be pure woo!

I mean, jeez. Get on with the times. For an example to follow? What about the church of england? They've moved on from ignorance by making a formal apology to Charles Darwin. Sure its late but its a sign that they are ready to move on and be more accepting instead of irrational reactions. Like, you know, 'false prophets'

Rant. Out.

This is too long for Twitter so I'm posting it here.

Post-humanism would be too boring if it we just evolved into a single tribe of post-humans. Needs post-chronos, post-religionism, post-nerd, post-geek, post-post, post-hygeine, post-postal. Uh stuff. Would also be fun to RPG in this world I think.

Random Ubuntu-ness. Why does evolution need so many critical updates. And why do I download these updates when I don't use evolution?

Has it been four years already?

I feel so far away. I had a small private breakdown recently, a conflagration of a multitude of things that reminded me of my loneliness.

Turned 23, minor footnote. They say age doesn't matter. I would agree except I feel like I'm going nowhere. I'm about due for a quarter life crisis it seems. Should I have achieved more by now? I worry I'll never get anywhere, nothing is driving me forward except for sheer momentum. What am I waking up for every morning? Theres the hazy goal of "get a job in the games industry" but what is that? It's nothing substantial, nothing inspirational.

Critical introspection. I am shallow. I never express what is in my head, I don't process input anymore (have I ever?), I've gone into pure automaton mode. Being a robot isn't all that its cracked up to be. Give me back my body.

Found Microserf's on sale. Halfway through it. In retrospect it feels more depressing now, the inversion of the hope it inspired in me.

I wish I had the guts to just ask her to break me now.

My gorram legs hurt. I shouldn't have done it when I'm still kinda sick but I was hopped up on dopamine when I decided to walk all the way from school to the house. I've finally achieved it! All told it took me 2 solid hours of walking, time well spent. I don't think walking actually focuses my thoughts better, rather I came to the conclusion that it helps me tune out my brain as I just focus on getting there.

When I see the world I want to do it with a good pair of shoes and all the time in the world, the better to soak in the details that you might otherwise miss behind a car or something. It was a treat to walk through neighbourhoods on the route I usually take and discover so much sensory details that the car deprives me.

I still don't know if I've been emptied of all feelings. El Roboto out.