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I'm not quite confident over my change of course now. Yes, it's more or less my dream course, what I had originally wanted when I came out of secondary school. Yes, it's more or less the course I cried over when I found out I couldn't enter it. But you see during my days in an IT course, I think I developed a superiority complex. In my days at NYP, I was the best at what I did in my class. Okay, so I wasn't exactly the best at it in my batch; and to be honest... noone in my NYP class was really good in programming anyway. But still, I was the best at something! I was godlike! While I occasionally was frustrated by my classmates bothering me with simple questions about programming, it was still a heady feeling knowing for a fact that you are the best.

In IT, I was in my element. I was the alpha geek. I was the guy everyone wanted to be on the same group as. Please hold while I savour that moment.

Wait, come to think of it, they were only taking advantage of me. The bastards! (note to any DIT0316'ers who happens to read this: joke only lah!)

But seriously, I have doubts over this course. I know I'm not the best artist around. I just need to look at over to my left/right/front/back to see evidence of this. It drives me a bit crazy. A bit jealous. And a whole lot of scared. Its somewhat irrational I know. Why should I care about what other people are doing? I should just care that what I am doing is making me happy. I came to this course to develop myself as an artist, to improve. I can't expect to be the best at everything. I'll just end up unhappy.

Yet I wonder if this is what I should be doing. If this is my calling. I guess this is where parental influence somehow comes in. When I was a kid, my parents used to encourage my artistic talent. I remember this one time, I must have been six or seven years old, I attempted to do a sketch of my father. When I showed it to my mom, I recieved the most unexpected response. She laughed. I don't really remember my sketch looking like my father, but that was what she said she was laughing about. She was surprised at how much my drawing looked like my dad.

Perhaps that moment is the one that solidified my interest in drawing. Parental approval. Now, I don't know. I do love visual arts and computers which is why this course seems perfect for me. But is it mine? Do I own this?

Oh, and I somewhat miss writing stories. I've hardly written anything since I left secondary school, and by that time I remember getting lazy and not bothering with handing in my final composition to my english teacher (whose name escapes me now though he was one of the best teachers I've ever had). And we're supposed to write a one act play for finals in Art Apreciation class. I think this will be interesting.

Crushworthy

Jeiel's list of things that are currently crushworthy:

• Stars. Specifically the song "Heart". I can hardly leave my room nowadays without having played it at least once. Gorgeous lyrics, lush chorus' and heartwrenching vocal interplays. Absolutely makes me swoon.
• anacrusis/Cosette. Mia I know you had a momentary crush on the author but read this! Read from bottom up. Because Kronos is reversed in blogs.
• Girls who candidly admit to reading in the lavatory.

oh the silliness!

Grah. I was halfway through writing this post when all of a sudden the school computer asplodes on me and I lost the things that I've written. Augh. Blah.

Oh well, for now advanced happy birthday to you Mia. If you read this before we meet later tonight, yay. If not, oh well.

I'll continue this post later on the day. *twitches* Web Development teacher just talked about the <marquee> tag. Grnff. And she was teaching about the <font> tag before. I can't count the times that I want to scream "GET WITH THE TIMES WOMAN" during classes that teach HTML.

Oh, and I'm reading The Catcher in the Rye now. On a blog I was reading the other day, the writer called teenage bloggers (or, in my vernacular, teen-angsters) cyber Holden Caufields. I thought it was fitting.

GOOD DEITY! SHE'S USING THE <center> TAG NOW

Continuation

Okay, so I've been in my new school for a whole week now. Been okay so far. Don't know too many people yet. Okay, so I don't really know anyone yet. I take a while to acclimatize to new environs and all the classes I go to already have their established cliques. Thats the problem with transferring I suppose. You don't go through that whole get-to-know-you crap (wait that sounds like a good thing actually) and each class I go to, I only see them for one subject. Oh and theres that whole introvertness thing too :P

I'll survive through, don't worry.

I do so like Art Apreciation class because my seat is practically surrounded by girls. Problem is the girl sitting next to me was reading one of those cheap, thin, romance novellas. Books that are worse than daytime soaps with no redeeming quality whatsoever. It was slightly depressing. I know it sounds like an elitist bastard thing to say, but there you go, I question my seatmates intellect just by the book she was reading. I shouldn't be though, seeing as how I have a friendster account. And seeing as how I actually log into it frequently. I think just having a friendster account disqualifies you from being an elitist bastard, what with friendster being practically that place where the proles lived in 1984. Now, on the other hand, if I had an Orkut account...

I guess thats all I can say about my new school for now.

I took the MRT too this week. By myself even. Though I never really worried much when I was riding the train (other than getting lost) this article kinda makes me nervous now. Back in Singapore the only way you'd die in train stations is if you were being a stupid idiot and fell into the tracks. Here, you can get shot at. How lovely.

So tomorrow I go to a whole new school. Good stuff that. I'm not really nervous or anxious or anything of that kind right now, but I probably will be tomorrow. See, I even procastinate nerves. Weird/interesting thing about APC. Students have to wear office attire to school for most days. It's better than having a uniform I suppose. At least you'll be responsible when you look stupid. As I don't really have office attire in my wardrobe, I had to go out and, ugh, shop. Good thing all it entailed was getting the right size and then just picking out colours. No trying out outfits or anything. Oh, and I got a spiffy new bag too, which rocks.

I think I will enjoy APC a lot more than AMA. I hope to anyway. When I was enrolling, I happened to pass by a lab that was totally dedicated to open source! A whole network of 20 or so computers just dedicated to running open source apps. Fantastic! I wonder if I can go in and play around even if I'm not a CS/IT student.

Watched Kung-Fu Hustle today. As long as you don't expect anything more than slapstick humour and great action, its an excellent movie to watch. Great humour and action although the story is a bit on the weak side. I was especially let down by the ending. It just felt very abrupt like it was put there just to end the story. The love interest was also a huge letdown since it never really plays a huge part in the story and the way it was tied up was just too neat for me. The effects work on it is also a study in how 3d effects can be great as long as its done in moderation (Matrix, I'm looking at you). Kung Fu Hustle blended live action and 3d effects way better in its major fight scene. Think Matrix's burly brawl but better.

So I'm out of that stupid school. FINALLY. As I was coming back from the mall, I passed by the school building without feeling the depression I would normally feel. It's a great feeling. Now I'm pondering whether to initiate bridge burning ops (which is likely to take the dreaded 'e' word, effort) or to just leave that place alone. Ah well, since I'm too lazy, I'll probably just leave it alone.

So it turns out that the course I mentioned in the previous post accepts people regardless of colour blindness or not. Happy days! Tomorrow I'll see if they can let me start this semester, which starts on Monday. There may be some problems with the transferring procedures since I'm still waiting for AMA (previous school) to release my credentials but so far I'm happy with APC (Asia Pacific College).

Will I miss AMA? Heck no. Maybe the things around school though. In AMA, there were two malls within walking distance which were nice places to escape from the drudgery of school. APC doesn't seem to be near any place I can entertain myself, but oh well. At least the change of course means that I'll no longer bear a hate for my school. Another thing I might miss about AMA is the Starbucks behind it, near to UAP which was really nice for girl watching. But then again, APC may be good for girlwatching itself.

Well.. maybe I'll miss certain people from AMA. I don't think I'll be able to say a proper farewell to them since I'm unsure if I'll ever see them again.

So tomorrow I go back to school to collect my crappy results. And it will be crappy cause I let this tri go to crap. I'll be checking out another school though, mainly cause it has a course I want to go to. I want to ditch IT cause really, I can self study that quite easily. I want to do something more creative, follow my dreams and take control of my life. Or some crap like that anyway. I wonder if the course has restrictions on colour blind people entering, just like in Singapore. Colour blindness just surprises me sometimes. I was playing a game the other day when my icklest sister pointed out that the bullets I shot out were green when all along I thought they were some sick shade of brown.

Random linking ahoy!

• Clever Logos. Once again I am fascinated by logo designs. I love the way they can communicate so economically. Also, the next time you see a FedEx logo, look at it closely and try to find an arrow. It's so cleverly hidden in plain sight that I adore it.

• Colour Schemes. Some nice colour schemes to try out. And while we're on the topic of colour, how about a colour scheme forecast for 2005? Meanwhile, ColorWhore seems to be back up now, after a little spate of domain stealing. Hurrah!

• Websnark. If you love webcomics, bookmark this blog now. Quite an insightful blog on webcomics. I've found quite a few good new comics to read through this blog.

• The MatrIEx. Just read it damnit.

• Anacrusis. The power of being economical with words. A great little experiment where the author writes a short story, keeping it at 101 words. It reads beautifully.

• Lifehacks. Some really useful stuff there. Right now though, I want one of those Moleskine things mentioned there. Looks like a really yummy notepad. And yes, I'm applying the adjective yummy to a non-edible object.

• Copper. Wonderful monthly webcomic. Fantastic art and the stories told are just imaginative, provocative and heartwarming. My fave among them.

• Talking Cock. I haven't visited the website for ages but when I dropped by just now, it seems an interesting thing happened to the website during the establishment of Singapore as a dynasty. Talking Cock went down on August 11, just before the handover of power to Lee Hsien Loong on August 12. Even though it could be just an innocent little glitch, you do have to admit the timing seems suspicious.